One of the things that I have always insisted on is having good looks. Insecurities aside, I spend a lot of time on a daily basis to look good. I make sure my hair looks a certain way. My face looks a certain way. My outfit has to appear a certain way. And everything has to be (or at least appear to be) effortless.
Ever since I come to the realisation that I cannot be taller, and I make peace with my twin A-cups, decide that my inverted triangle shape is pretty cool, I made a conscious decision that what makes a person attractive, to me, is how well groomed he/she is.
All of my friends are well groomed, dress well and as such, are attractive in my eyes. We spend hours talking about outfits, designs and cuts, proportions. One said just a couple of days ago, that in another life, he would be a fashion designer. And I said, I would be a model and I could be his muse.
Whether we want to admit it or not, we do judge people based on how they look. I know I get judged based on how I look. I don't care whether the judgement is favourable or not. But this is probably not true for most people out there. Each and every day, I want to project a particular image, and that is independent on whether other people like it or not.
Put simple, it is my version of being myself.
The same way we get judged based on our postal codes, how neat/stylish our abodes are, what ride we've got, how we spend our downtime, etc etc etc.
The world is a judgemental cocktail mix. Why is it so hard to admit that.
Other people's reactions
There are not very many people who stand out as being attractive. This is by default because most of the world fall into the category of what statisticians call average. Or in lay man's speak, ordinary. This is not a bad thing per se, it is just what it is.
But there are some people who are born attractive. Like this, for example. Then there are those who deliberately make themselves more attractive. Like this, for example. I like looking at both because I am a sucker for beautiful things. Both are inspirational to me in their own ways.
In the land of Oz, we have this thing called tall puppy syndrome. The majority of Australians hate those who stand out from the crowd. No, this is not just something I observe. This is something almost everyone I have spoken to admit to observing. It is an acceptable phenomenon here and no one is doing anything about it. People take it as a given.
I love tall puppies. Gawd, who wouldn't. They obviously have the potential to go places higher and better than most of us. I sincerely hope that they do not have to tone down their aura and talents in an attempt to fit in. Fitting in is overrated, seriously. You don't want to settle down with friends who do not love you for who you are.
I am also continuously saddened by the fact that a lot of people in this world make themselves feel better by bringing other people down. And the only way to counter this is to actually maintain your high ground. Do not stoop down to their level. Remain true to who you are. Remember who you are and who you want to be.
The people we remember
Last night as I walked home from the office, I thought to myself that the people that I remember in all walks of life generally fall into two categories: those who are really good and those who are really bad. The ones in between are just passing strangers, who become familiar strangers at some point or another. Our inherent rosy retrospection bias would ensure that we remember the good ones more - which is good. The bad ones we remember so that we appreciate the good ones.
Sometimes, it really is not you, it is them.