So.
Word got out that Multiply is closing down its platform. I guess Facebook has indirectly (or directly) killed it. Prior to Facebook, I was blogging at Multiply. I am now in the process of making a copy of everything I've written on Multiply. I didn't realise that I have written so much.
Has this ever happen to anyone? Not so much the blogging platform decides to close down (it happened with my other blog at vox), but the bit about not realising how much you've written? This takes me by surprise because I never keep track as to how much I've written. I just wrote and I still write. I just never put my name on any of them.
Because the last thing I want to have is to have my family reading whatever it is that I have written. I am pretty sure that one of them is going to take whatever I have written personally and then all hell breaks loose. My family is a typical Asian family whereby bluntness and honesty are put on the back burner in the name of being polite. Seriously, if I have to pretend to be polite to another person in the family, I think I might just loose it (I did, actually). I get that we need to appreciate the shit that other people have done for us, and I am of the school of thought that says that to fully appreciate, one must be able to give honest feedback.
I don't really care about the rest of other people/acquaintances who want to take what I've written personally. To me, this is an indication of their self-absorbness (yea, just invented that word) and I don't care about self-absorbed people. They are too difficult to be friends witih. This is of course because I am the most self-absorbed person in this planet, so I know what it really feels to deal with someone who is self-absorbed on daily basis. And I only have energy for one person and that is me.
Anyway.
Today I had lunch with one of my friends/mentors who told me to put my name on this blog and on everything else that I have written. Stand by your opinions, he said. I don't have a problem standing by my opinion. The problem (or potential problem) would happen when someone tries to censor me.
Believe it or not, I actually tell my boyfriend that whatever it is that I have written that he may or may not come across one day, he needs to know that whatever that I have written is exactly that - a piece of writing. It is not an indication of my feelings towards him and how much love (or lack thereof) exists between us in our relationship, which I do not really want to share with the world. When I say the world, I literally mean the world. There are a few, privileged people in this planet who get to share this with me, but these people are rare and all of them have been sworn to secrecy.
I have made a decision that I will not allow anyone to censor me. I will not take my freedom of speech for granted. And for now, I prefer to write without my name plastered all over this blog.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
The power of average
I think one of the most abused statistical metrix since the beginning of time is this thing called the mean, also known as the average. Everybody wants to know what the average performance is, and whether they are above average. If they are above average, everything is surely fine. We are above average afterall. If they are under average, they can be driven to feeling absolutely guilty for being under average. It is interpreted as a sure sign that they are not putting in enough effort. How can you not perform on average?
I don't know what gives average so much power. I get that there is an inherent need in human being to constantly compare itself to the majority and if they are slightly better than the majority, then that's great because it means they are not that much different,thus they fit in; but they are not so ordinary, because they are above average.
I do admit to have succumbed to the opportunity of making a lot of people feel really guilty when they perform below average. So in this respect, as much as I personally do not feel good (and think that it is silly to derive satisfaction) from being above average, I do feel bad (and can make others feel bad) for being below average.
Of course all of these are silly, and irrational at best. Just because everyone else is performing at 75% does not mean that you have to perform that 75% minimum. Afterall, the way the average score is calculated, you would understand that it is just an indication of middle score and nothing else.
But it is so common that it has become acceptable with very little, if any, questions. The average tells us basically almost nothing. Take for example, the performance of a student across his subjects in a given semester. He performs at 90% in one, 80% in another, 70% and 60% in the rest. This gives him an average of 75%, which is interpreted to indicate that he is likely to score 75% in his subsequent subjects, but in no way explain the spread in his performance in the semester just passed. Change the student performance to company performance or personal savings goal and you get the drift.
The point is that deviation from the average is an acceptable, given fact that almost always happens in every context imaginable. It makes predictions more challenging, but also more interesting all the same.
I am currently thinking of a business issue that has got nothing to do with averages computations, but for some reason, I started thinking about averages and how it is often used in modelling and the plethora of people who caution against relying too heavily on it. I just need to get this off my head.
On a totally different note, does anyone know that the multiply platform is going to be closed down permanently on 1 Dec 2012? I used to write in that platform, I guess I must start moving my pieces. I find this exercise rather annoying, but it is also one of the reasons why I use a platform like google, which is highly unlikely to close down permanently.
I don't know what gives average so much power. I get that there is an inherent need in human being to constantly compare itself to the majority and if they are slightly better than the majority, then that's great because it means they are not that much different,thus they fit in; but they are not so ordinary, because they are above average.
I do admit to have succumbed to the opportunity of making a lot of people feel really guilty when they perform below average. So in this respect, as much as I personally do not feel good (and think that it is silly to derive satisfaction) from being above average, I do feel bad (and can make others feel bad) for being below average.
Of course all of these are silly, and irrational at best. Just because everyone else is performing at 75% does not mean that you have to perform that 75% minimum. Afterall, the way the average score is calculated, you would understand that it is just an indication of middle score and nothing else.
But it is so common that it has become acceptable with very little, if any, questions. The average tells us basically almost nothing. Take for example, the performance of a student across his subjects in a given semester. He performs at 90% in one, 80% in another, 70% and 60% in the rest. This gives him an average of 75%, which is interpreted to indicate that he is likely to score 75% in his subsequent subjects, but in no way explain the spread in his performance in the semester just passed. Change the student performance to company performance or personal savings goal and you get the drift.
The point is that deviation from the average is an acceptable, given fact that almost always happens in every context imaginable. It makes predictions more challenging, but also more interesting all the same.
I am currently thinking of a business issue that has got nothing to do with averages computations, but for some reason, I started thinking about averages and how it is often used in modelling and the plethora of people who caution against relying too heavily on it. I just need to get this off my head.
On a totally different note, does anyone know that the multiply platform is going to be closed down permanently on 1 Dec 2012? I used to write in that platform, I guess I must start moving my pieces. I find this exercise rather annoying, but it is also one of the reasons why I use a platform like google, which is highly unlikely to close down permanently.
Friday, August 3, 2012
A character building exercise
I did not pass my driving test on my first go. My sister, the perfect daughter, passed it on her first go and set the standard for the rest of us (only me, actually). I passed it on my third attempt. This is somewhat typical of me – I fail and then I try again. Then I fail, again and then I try, again. And again and again, until I get what I seek out to achieve. It is for this reason that persistence is my middle name.
In my previous life, I was a young teenager who was eager to drive, so much so that I managed to get my parents to send me to a driving school. This is partially because I was desperate to grow up and living in a place with terrible public transport (the kind that is so terrible that my parents forbid me from getting into it). I have always viewed myself as a free spirit. I was born to fly – maybe not so literally – but I want to set my own destinations, my own route and well, you guessed it, my own vehicle.
Ah, to be so young and to be so idealistic. I am pretty sure a lot have changed since then, but deep down, these are the things that I still dream about. These are the elements of life that I seek out to have in everything that I do: my own list of things to do, my own way of achieving them, my own tunes, my own rhythm; my dance of life. I am never one to blend with the crowd, but I never try to stand out either, at least not deliberately anyway. I just like staying true to myself and if there is anything in my life that I do well, then that would need to be one of those things.
I was (and in some days, still am) an impatient driver. I am aware of this and I try so so hard to be patient, not just when driving, but when living life in general. I admit that patience is far away from becoming one of my forte, and I am starting to realize that it is a skill worth acquiring, thus the extra effort to be patient. I know that my definition of patient is no where near the real definition of patient; baby steps, alright. One step at a time.
There is something about failing. It builds character. I know that whenever I fail at something, my first reaction is that I am angry with myself. I am always hard on myself and I set a personal standard that is up to my liking, and this is often higher than the average standard. I do not consider it a success, for example, if I manage to pass a subject back in college. I have to get a minimum of A. I do not consider it a success if I manage to just graduate, I want to graduate summa cum laude. And I only managed to graduate magna cum laude. To me, aiming is comparable to shooting for the stars: the higher, the better. At times I get to where I want to be, the rest of the times, close to it. Before I get there, I hit many brick walls. I have to find ways around them, including learning to jump higher.
When I am desperate enough for something, I end up surprising myself a lot more than I surprise the people around me. Somehow, I got lucky this way – I always have someone who believes in me, in the moments that I have doubts in my own abilities. I always have someone who willingly offers a helping hand so that I can be that much better, so that I can run that much faster, and jump that much higher. I have these teachers in my life who do not even consider themselves as teachers, but are the ones who end up teaching me so much about myself that I do not even know before. When you have someone who brings out the best in you, being your best becomes a natural extension of life. There is nothing else to do other than being your best. It becomes your character.
In my previous life, I was a young teenager who was eager to drive, so much so that I managed to get my parents to send me to a driving school. This is partially because I was desperate to grow up and living in a place with terrible public transport (the kind that is so terrible that my parents forbid me from getting into it). I have always viewed myself as a free spirit. I was born to fly – maybe not so literally – but I want to set my own destinations, my own route and well, you guessed it, my own vehicle.
Ah, to be so young and to be so idealistic. I am pretty sure a lot have changed since then, but deep down, these are the things that I still dream about. These are the elements of life that I seek out to have in everything that I do: my own list of things to do, my own way of achieving them, my own tunes, my own rhythm; my dance of life. I am never one to blend with the crowd, but I never try to stand out either, at least not deliberately anyway. I just like staying true to myself and if there is anything in my life that I do well, then that would need to be one of those things.
I was (and in some days, still am) an impatient driver. I am aware of this and I try so so hard to be patient, not just when driving, but when living life in general. I admit that patience is far away from becoming one of my forte, and I am starting to realize that it is a skill worth acquiring, thus the extra effort to be patient. I know that my definition of patient is no where near the real definition of patient; baby steps, alright. One step at a time.
There is something about failing. It builds character. I know that whenever I fail at something, my first reaction is that I am angry with myself. I am always hard on myself and I set a personal standard that is up to my liking, and this is often higher than the average standard. I do not consider it a success, for example, if I manage to pass a subject back in college. I have to get a minimum of A. I do not consider it a success if I manage to just graduate, I want to graduate summa cum laude. And I only managed to graduate magna cum laude. To me, aiming is comparable to shooting for the stars: the higher, the better. At times I get to where I want to be, the rest of the times, close to it. Before I get there, I hit many brick walls. I have to find ways around them, including learning to jump higher.
When I am desperate enough for something, I end up surprising myself a lot more than I surprise the people around me. Somehow, I got lucky this way – I always have someone who believes in me, in the moments that I have doubts in my own abilities. I always have someone who willingly offers a helping hand so that I can be that much better, so that I can run that much faster, and jump that much higher. I have these teachers in my life who do not even consider themselves as teachers, but are the ones who end up teaching me so much about myself that I do not even know before. When you have someone who brings out the best in you, being your best becomes a natural extension of life. There is nothing else to do other than being your best. It becomes your character.
Saturday, July 28, 2012
Why I am put off parenting
FOUR years ago I was sitting in a similar space, in fact, the space exactly downstairs from where I am right now, fiercely fighting for a happy life. It was a difficult battle. I was coming out of a rocky relationship, wrapped up a doctorate and was back to living with my family. The last bit turned out to be the hardest one of all.
It was not so much that I was taking a step back by moving back home, it was more like living with their expectations of me. It was (and still is) a lot of expectations. They expected me to dance to their rhythm without exactly telling me how to dance to that rhythm. Prior to that I have been dancing my own dance in my own life and had not involved them in much of it, so you get the idea.
That arrangement, thankfully, did not last very long. I got over the relationship, embraced change, and got back to dancing my own steps, with my own rhythm.
That said, it was a difficult time of my life.
The hardest bit of it was the fact that I had to hide it from my own family - because I tried telling them once and instead of getting a compassionate ear, I got laughter and ridicule. It sucks being the youngest kid in the family. I blame my parents because they think if it works for one kid, it should work for the other. Needless to say, they are not big on the idea of individuality. Then again, we are Asian, so that probably explains the attitude, or at least partially.
My parents would be the first people in this planet who kicked and screamed every time I told them that their parenting style is full-on Asian, although not so much tiger, parenting. They are able to successfully use guilt to get everything that they want. This puts me off having children, which when I told them about, they conveniently blame on the fact that I was a sub-standard human being to start off with, to which the solution is to get over it and get better.
They are so lucky I do not turn out to be drug-addict junkie who is slowly fading away in a dark alley somewhere.
It was not so much that I was taking a step back by moving back home, it was more like living with their expectations of me. It was (and still is) a lot of expectations. They expected me to dance to their rhythm without exactly telling me how to dance to that rhythm. Prior to that I have been dancing my own dance in my own life and had not involved them in much of it, so you get the idea.
That arrangement, thankfully, did not last very long. I got over the relationship, embraced change, and got back to dancing my own steps, with my own rhythm.
That said, it was a difficult time of my life.
The hardest bit of it was the fact that I had to hide it from my own family - because I tried telling them once and instead of getting a compassionate ear, I got laughter and ridicule. It sucks being the youngest kid in the family. I blame my parents because they think if it works for one kid, it should work for the other. Needless to say, they are not big on the idea of individuality. Then again, we are Asian, so that probably explains the attitude, or at least partially.
My parents would be the first people in this planet who kicked and screamed every time I told them that their parenting style is full-on Asian, although not so much tiger, parenting. They are able to successfully use guilt to get everything that they want. This puts me off having children, which when I told them about, they conveniently blame on the fact that I was a sub-standard human being to start off with, to which the solution is to get over it and get better.
They are so lucky I do not turn out to be drug-addict junkie who is slowly fading away in a dark alley somewhere.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
On happiness
Winter is really getting to me. I don't function very well in the cold. I know that it is unfair to blame my general lack of joie de vivre on the weather (or rather, the temperature). I am feeling flat. There we go, I said it.
My cure to this is being productive - not necessarily busy (as in cramming activities in my schedule), but more like getting the things on my to do list ticked off. Usually, I would feel better because I quite literally say to myself: now I can just laze around and do nothing, without worrying about all of these things that I have to do.
Today I have been productive! I was productive at the office, I was productive at home. I was even willing to do things in the name of experimentation (the result of which is not very successful). And here I am at the end of the day - still feeling flat.
Le sigh.
It is in days like this, isn't it, that the battle of keeping oneself happy has to be won. It is during these times that the battle is harder than usual that the fighter has to persist on the end goal, no matter how temporary the victory can be.
The older I am, the more I realise that being happy is a daily battle. Just because you are happy today does not automatically mean you will be happy tomorrow. Because we can only be happy at this point in time (duh). I wake up everyday choosing to be happy, especially on the days that the choice is harder to make.
My cure to this is being productive - not necessarily busy (as in cramming activities in my schedule), but more like getting the things on my to do list ticked off. Usually, I would feel better because I quite literally say to myself: now I can just laze around and do nothing, without worrying about all of these things that I have to do.
Today I have been productive! I was productive at the office, I was productive at home. I was even willing to do things in the name of experimentation (the result of which is not very successful). And here I am at the end of the day - still feeling flat.
Le sigh.
It is in days like this, isn't it, that the battle of keeping oneself happy has to be won. It is during these times that the battle is harder than usual that the fighter has to persist on the end goal, no matter how temporary the victory can be.
The older I am, the more I realise that being happy is a daily battle. Just because you are happy today does not automatically mean you will be happy tomorrow. Because we can only be happy at this point in time (duh). I wake up everyday choosing to be happy, especially on the days that the choice is harder to make.
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Discrimination between various income groups
We live in a society where our government discriminates against various income groups. This discrimination often favours the lower end of this scale - at least that's what it is in Australia right now.
Some days, this fact depresses me more than others, although in general, I try not to "feel" it so much. I think this is because I have not been largely on the receiving end of this discrimination, so it is quite unfortunately annoying to see that I have to support various things that the government thinks I should support.
I don't mind sharing what I've got - but I would like to have a say in how much I share these things and where/to whom I am sharing them with. I am a big proponent for education, especially for young people, so I'd like to see my tax contributions go towards schooling and any other programs that encourage children to go to school. Don't ask me why, deep down, I believe that education is one of the tickets to success. At the very minimal, it gives you something to do so that you stay out of trouble. Yes, I get that most of life lessons are learnt outside the classroom, but it really does not negate the value of the lessons taught within the classrooms.
Another area is the elderlies and the disabled. This is rooted in my belief that in a relatively advanced society that we live in, our level of advancement is judged by how well we treat those who are less fortunate than ourselves. If we go to a third world country, the chance of a disabled person surviving is a lot lower than if he/she wins the geographical lottery of being born in Australia. Sorry, there is no other way of putting this.
I get that there are other things that is required to make our society the way it is right now, so my tax contribution needs to be spread amongst those things, yet it still annoys me when I can't have a say in terms of where I'd like my contribution to go to. Surely there are other people who feel strongly towards other things, why can't their money goes towards those things.
The answer to that is that it is too hard to manage. In an ideal society, we can just allocate our contribution into the various pools of funds designated for specific purposes. We are a long long way from that.
In every society, there are always those who want to rot the system. This is incredibly unfortunate because these people are denying those who are in genuine need off the assistance that was theirs to begin with. I don't know how these people sleep at night knowing that they have stolen something from those who are in need.
Human nature though is somewhat rather weird. I have not met anyone who wants to pay more taxes, for example. I think deep down we are built to maximise our individual marginal utility.
I guess back in 2007, a lot of people think that voting for Kevin 07 would mean that they would be better off. I'd like to know if they still feel the same way right now.
The wage earners and the those in the top marginal tax bracket contributes the majority of tax revenue in this country. It is just ironic that they are also the ones most discriminated against.
Anyway, I am writing this so that I can stop thinking about this. I need to think about other things, and also think about nothing at all for maybe 10 seconds.
Some days, this fact depresses me more than others, although in general, I try not to "feel" it so much. I think this is because I have not been largely on the receiving end of this discrimination, so it is quite unfortunately annoying to see that I have to support various things that the government thinks I should support.
I don't mind sharing what I've got - but I would like to have a say in how much I share these things and where/to whom I am sharing them with. I am a big proponent for education, especially for young people, so I'd like to see my tax contributions go towards schooling and any other programs that encourage children to go to school. Don't ask me why, deep down, I believe that education is one of the tickets to success. At the very minimal, it gives you something to do so that you stay out of trouble. Yes, I get that most of life lessons are learnt outside the classroom, but it really does not negate the value of the lessons taught within the classrooms.
Another area is the elderlies and the disabled. This is rooted in my belief that in a relatively advanced society that we live in, our level of advancement is judged by how well we treat those who are less fortunate than ourselves. If we go to a third world country, the chance of a disabled person surviving is a lot lower than if he/she wins the geographical lottery of being born in Australia. Sorry, there is no other way of putting this.
I get that there are other things that is required to make our society the way it is right now, so my tax contribution needs to be spread amongst those things, yet it still annoys me when I can't have a say in terms of where I'd like my contribution to go to. Surely there are other people who feel strongly towards other things, why can't their money goes towards those things.
The answer to that is that it is too hard to manage. In an ideal society, we can just allocate our contribution into the various pools of funds designated for specific purposes. We are a long long way from that.
In every society, there are always those who want to rot the system. This is incredibly unfortunate because these people are denying those who are in genuine need off the assistance that was theirs to begin with. I don't know how these people sleep at night knowing that they have stolen something from those who are in need.
Human nature though is somewhat rather weird. I have not met anyone who wants to pay more taxes, for example. I think deep down we are built to maximise our individual marginal utility.
I guess back in 2007, a lot of people think that voting for Kevin 07 would mean that they would be better off. I'd like to know if they still feel the same way right now.
The wage earners and the those in the top marginal tax bracket contributes the majority of tax revenue in this country. It is just ironic that they are also the ones most discriminated against.
Anyway, I am writing this so that I can stop thinking about this. I need to think about other things, and also think about nothing at all for maybe 10 seconds.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
All that hoo haa on weddings
I don’t normally think about these things let alone write about them.
But in the light of so many of my friends getting married, there are a few things that do bug me.
There is nothing wrong with finding love per se – deep down, we all want to love and to be loved in return. Those who are single would know who much we all want this, even when we are only willing to acknowledge it privately. Viewed from this angle, those who found love are lucky. Weddings are a celebration of love (supposedly) and so I get that we celebrate weddings.
What I don’t get are the things surrounding the weddings itself, starting from the hen’s/buck’s night. So far, I have somehow managed to dodge this one and I have every intention do so for as long as I can. If we spend so much time and agony trying to find love, why do we have to mourn the last night of being single and have to resort to things like strippers? I am sorry, I find this particular event simply revolting. If I am getting married to the love of my life, I am going to be so happy that I don’t mind not being single anymore. This is because I know that I can only marry a man who does not restrict my freedom. If I want to go to a strip club, I will just ask him to come along with me and I am pretty sure he will agree to it. That said, I don’t want to go to one and I do not want to see a stripper anyway, really seriously. The real thing, aka making love, is way better than that. So no, I don’t see why I should spend a few hours and ridiculous amount of money to entertain my friend with strippers and penis-shaped balloons and blown condoms.
I get that we want to spend time together with our friends and family as a single person, and I am more than willing to participate in things that actually involve some real bonding activities – like a good meal, or some other event that does not involve degradation of human interaction like strippers.
Now onto the wedding itself. For once, I do not get how people successfully manage to put themselves into high five digits debt in the name of a wedding celebration. I would honestly put that money as a down payment of my house or investment property. What? That’s the logical thing to do. Life, or rather, my life, is challenging enough already, and I do not wish to put myself and my significant other through such kind of financial burden when we have barely started our lives together. How do you move forward when you have to fork out a handsome sum every week to pay for an event that is already in the past?
In the same line of logic, I do not see why a groom-to-be has to put himself through debt to buy the engagement ring. In the chance that my future husband is reading this, honey, please don’t buy me a ring that you cannot afford. I do not view the price as the ring as an indication of your love to me. And please DON’T buy me diamond. I think that stone is so overly overrated I can’t even begin to say why I don’t want it as my engagement ring.
Another thing I don’t get is couples who plan a wedding that requires their guests to travel. As a person who gets invited to events like this, let me just say this out loud: if there are two weddings at the same time that I am invited to, the one that is in Sydney gets higher priority. Why? It is less hassle for me to attend, I obviously receive invites for both weddings, so both sets of couples presumably want me to be there, and as such, I do not need to justify why I pick the one that is less hassle for me. Furthermore, the couple with the off-site wedding should not be offended if I decline to attend. Like really, surely you would know that the chance of people attending is somewhat lower if they are required to take time off and then travel just to attend your wedding. I don’t even want to start talking about those couples who demand so much out of their friends and family when it comes to their weddings. I get that this is a very important event in your lives, but really, it does not give you the pass to be jerks in the months leading up to the big day.
I don't think I need to say that weddings are highly commercialised these days - just like any event in life really. But I also believe that we have a choice in these things, something I'd like to call personal responsibility. And part of growing up is to be able to make decisions which consequences we can bear.
I guess I am just different. I prefer to enjoy my life some other way.
But in the light of so many of my friends getting married, there are a few things that do bug me.
There is nothing wrong with finding love per se – deep down, we all want to love and to be loved in return. Those who are single would know who much we all want this, even when we are only willing to acknowledge it privately. Viewed from this angle, those who found love are lucky. Weddings are a celebration of love (supposedly) and so I get that we celebrate weddings.
What I don’t get are the things surrounding the weddings itself, starting from the hen’s/buck’s night. So far, I have somehow managed to dodge this one and I have every intention do so for as long as I can. If we spend so much time and agony trying to find love, why do we have to mourn the last night of being single and have to resort to things like strippers? I am sorry, I find this particular event simply revolting. If I am getting married to the love of my life, I am going to be so happy that I don’t mind not being single anymore. This is because I know that I can only marry a man who does not restrict my freedom. If I want to go to a strip club, I will just ask him to come along with me and I am pretty sure he will agree to it. That said, I don’t want to go to one and I do not want to see a stripper anyway, really seriously. The real thing, aka making love, is way better than that. So no, I don’t see why I should spend a few hours and ridiculous amount of money to entertain my friend with strippers and penis-shaped balloons and blown condoms.
I get that we want to spend time together with our friends and family as a single person, and I am more than willing to participate in things that actually involve some real bonding activities – like a good meal, or some other event that does not involve degradation of human interaction like strippers.
Now onto the wedding itself. For once, I do not get how people successfully manage to put themselves into high five digits debt in the name of a wedding celebration. I would honestly put that money as a down payment of my house or investment property. What? That’s the logical thing to do. Life, or rather, my life, is challenging enough already, and I do not wish to put myself and my significant other through such kind of financial burden when we have barely started our lives together. How do you move forward when you have to fork out a handsome sum every week to pay for an event that is already in the past?
In the same line of logic, I do not see why a groom-to-be has to put himself through debt to buy the engagement ring. In the chance that my future husband is reading this, honey, please don’t buy me a ring that you cannot afford. I do not view the price as the ring as an indication of your love to me. And please DON’T buy me diamond. I think that stone is so overly overrated I can’t even begin to say why I don’t want it as my engagement ring.
Another thing I don’t get is couples who plan a wedding that requires their guests to travel. As a person who gets invited to events like this, let me just say this out loud: if there are two weddings at the same time that I am invited to, the one that is in Sydney gets higher priority. Why? It is less hassle for me to attend, I obviously receive invites for both weddings, so both sets of couples presumably want me to be there, and as such, I do not need to justify why I pick the one that is less hassle for me. Furthermore, the couple with the off-site wedding should not be offended if I decline to attend. Like really, surely you would know that the chance of people attending is somewhat lower if they are required to take time off and then travel just to attend your wedding. I don’t even want to start talking about those couples who demand so much out of their friends and family when it comes to their weddings. I get that this is a very important event in your lives, but really, it does not give you the pass to be jerks in the months leading up to the big day.
I don't think I need to say that weddings are highly commercialised these days - just like any event in life really. But I also believe that we have a choice in these things, something I'd like to call personal responsibility. And part of growing up is to be able to make decisions which consequences we can bear.
I guess I am just different. I prefer to enjoy my life some other way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)